Jackson's first week of preschool

Anyone who knows Jackson knows that Jackson does what Jackson wants, when Jackson wants, how Jackson wants---everything on Jackson's terms. Well, his little world was turned upside-down this week when he started preschool. He is going to the same preschool Anna Catherine attended. His schedule is Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday 8:00-11:45 am. He was so excited about going. He has been asking to go all summer but I kept telling him he had to wait until August. Finally, his first day of school arrived.

Tuesday morning he jumped out of the van and went directly inside. When we went into his classroom you could see a look of confusion on his face. I explained that I would pick him up after lunch and gave him a kiss, a hug, and an I love you. He hugged me and said he loved me too and gave me a kiss. This happened several times as he was hesitant to leave me. The other children were eating breakfast so the substitute (his teacher was on vacation this week) sat Jackson at the table and gave him a cup of milk and a bowl of oatmeal. He just stared at the oatmeal and then at the other children eating. I know in his mind he was thinking, "You expect me to eat this!" I left the room and peaked in the window in the hallway. He had a look of sheer panic on his face. His bottom lip was sticking out two inches from his face as he looked around the table at all the strange faces of these people he had been left with. He wasn't crying but was obviously upset. He felt abandoned and it broke my heart! When I picked him up he was crying. The sub didn't realize he was a half-day student and made him lay down for nap time. He said he thought I wasn't coming to get him. Poor fella! As we were walking back to the car he said, "I had a good time today." That made me feel a little better. He hadn't been sad all day.

Wednesday morning he was once again excited about going to school. We arrived, he went into his classroom, and started playing with toys. I told him that I would pick him up after lunch, gave him a kiss, hug, and I love you, and walked out the door. He had no problems with me leaving--YES!! I thought we were having a great second day until I picked him up. I arrived a few minutes early so I was chatting with the director. I heard him crying down the hall, his classroom door opened, and his teacher stepped outside. I motioned for her to send him to me. He was so relieved to see me. He had been crying for an hour and fifteen minutes. Once again, he thought he had been abandoned. He said, "Mommy, you not coming back." Nice guilt trip for Mommy, Jackson! When we got in the van Jackson said that he had gotten in trouble on the playground for hitting a girl. We had a long talk about it and hopefully he will not have anymore social problems on the playground. Jackson is not an aggressive boy or a bully; he is just used to getting his way 97% of the time. It is an issue that he will have to work on. Other than the playground episode and feeling abandoned, he said he had a good day.

Thursday morning he was adamant that he was not going to school. We talked about it but he was still determined to stay with Chloe and me. He got out of the van, walked into the building, and down the hall with no problem. He stopped in front of his door and said he wasn't going in. I went in with him and told the sub that he was sad. I sat in a chair and sat him in my lap to once again explain that I would pick him up after lunch. I told him that he would never have to take a nap at school and that I would always pick him up. I gave him a hug, a kiss, and an I love you Jack. He reciprocated the affection and then went over to the animals and began playing without hesitation so I left. At 11:45 I stuck my head in the door and Jackson was standing to the side. When he saw me he said, "See, I tell you my Mommy come back" and down the hall we went. He said he had a good day.

Hopefully, next week will be better. Ms. Jessica will be back from vacation so he will be able to settle into a regular, structured environment. This is one of the reasons we opted to enroll him in preschool. Jackson needs structure, rules, and social interaction. He has rarely been away from me. He attended daycare for two months just after he was born so I could teach the remainder of the school year. Then he was home for the summer, we moved to Pontotoc, and he's been with me ever since, with the exception of staying in the gym nursery and the church nursery. Those are places he has been going since an infant so those are routine. It will take time but I think within the next few weeks Jackson will be comfortable at school.